I went through my junk mail box today. There was the usual; the free iPad I’d won in a contest I never entered on a website that suspiciously wants access to my bank account, another promising emaciated, silicone stuffed girls in a variety of perilous sexual positions and a message from god knows where alleging President Barack Obama has, in essence, told the US troops to go fuck themselves. This, of course, is not the first such message. For any of them. Had I bothered to claim them, I’d have about three dozen iPads. There is also a steady procession of “horny sluts” waiting for me, in particular, to sign up to their website. And, Barack Obama has become quite the James Bond villain since he took office. If I were to summarize the bundle of Barack messages I’ve received over the years, the man is a Muslim, socialist, Muslim sleeper agent with a forged Kenyan birth certificate who, naturally, hates veterans of his own military.
Look, it’s an all volunteer force,” Obama complained. “Nobody made these guys go to war. They had to have known and accepted the risks. Now they whine about bearing the costs of their choice? It doesn’t compute.”
Nice. “Obama” continues over what I’m sure is a stunned silence from press row and the frantic gesturing of Robert Gibbs to cut his damn mic.
“I thought these were people who were proud to sacrifice for their country,” Obama continued. “I wasn’t asking for blood, just money. With the country facing the worst financial crisis in its history, I’d have thought that the patriotic thing to do would be to try to help reduce the nation’s deficit. I guess I underestimated the selfishness of some of my fellow Americans.”
Why are we so obsessed with attacking Obama on such batshit crazy fronts like here, here and here or the half-dozen websites devoted to outing the President is the anti-Christ when there is enough disconnect between his campaign promises and Presidential policymaking to rationally discuss his merits as Head of State?
Needless to say, Obama never said the above quote – not that anyone without an axe to grind against the man would believe this nonsense. The quotes were written as a joke (I hope) by John Semmens, a right-wing satirist, and twisted into the most psychotic chain email ever.
For someone as smart and oratorically gifted as Obama, the dearth of respect he receives from certain corners of the media and population is staggering. We lambasted Bush as an idiot and Clinton as a horny frat boy – charges that could be debated with reasonable evidence. With Obama, however, his critics resort to fantasy and political thriller plots to malign him. These forms of attacks beg an equally passionate defense, which the left-leaning half of the media is more than happy to offer. This dynamic launches any rational political discourse off the bridge and into the water below. Instead of discussing whether this third war (or fourth if you count the Predator drones bombarding Pakistan) in Libya violates the Geneva Convention (which it does) and why the nation has accepted it so passively, we spend two months arguing whether he forged his birth certificate.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some porn in my inbox to get to.